This is the Abortion Testimony of Steven Millhorn


     Glory be unto our Heavenly Father in Jesus name, even in the midst of personal Judgment.  My Beloved, you can always be grateful to God for the Blessings He has bestowed upon you, for there is always someone else or other people who are worse off than yourself.  Case in point "me".... Let me explain.


     Now I’m speaking specially to those of you who have children or to those of you, who’ve had abortions.  I believe myself to be worse off than any of you no matter what the circumstances of how you obtained your child.


     You see, I have borne the cause and effect of my licentious behavior and debauchery which I committed as a youth from the age of 17 to about 26; in acting like an alley cat and a whoremonger (Much to the disapproval and angst of my most excellent parents).


     But because of my deceived and lawless regard for God’s Commandments and because of my pursuit of physical sexual pleasures with both married and unmarried girls and women, God withheld me from having children of my own.


     Albeit, I will always affirm that the unknown number of babies of mine that never saw the light of day due to abortion, I shall see again in Heaven. For they shall be fully grown and will surely welcome me with an open and loving heart as their dad in that day.


     But let me digress. In most of the half dozen or so cases that I was aware of, the end result of my regretful trysts and ill-advised rendezvous ended in abortions.


     At the time of my transgressions, I might have bragged or boasted from all the married and unmarried woman that I impregnated over those 9 years but now I am heavy. I say I am heavy, not for the guilt and burden of sinful fornication, adultery, and the murder of abortion, which the Lord Jesus removed by His Blood. But for shame in the knowledge that I had committed such acts and did so thinking myself to be a rather “good” guy.


     I wasn’t a big sinner like most of the people I hung out with. For they did far worse things than me. I just devoted myself to alcohol, women, illicit sex, gambling, porn and cussing, that was it! No lying, no stealing, no violence, no drugs, just a regular guy you know…. boy how deceived I was.


     But in 1985 as God began to put a stop to all this and as He began to pull me out of the impending fires of hell, He gradually put upon me the knowledge that one of the sowing and reaping consequences of my life would be that I would go childless. When I say childless, I don’t mean the souls in Heaven that are my offspring, I mean, I never had a daughter who called me daddy. I never had a boy that I could call “my son”. 



     I think of my lengthy and slow burning chastisement in this positive way: As a mother bird brings her chick a bug or a worm and drops it into the OPEN and AWAITING mouth of that chick....I also, continually open my mouth and am ever content with the Chastisement of the Lord, eating of His Good judgment upon me in withholding a child from me.



     Due to my alley cat ways and debauchery, I have no children on the earth to wish me a happy father's day or to hold my hand......but again, I look forward to the day that my half dozen or more children will see me in Heaven when I get there "Lord willing".



     So to anyone reading this testimony, I do not say all these things to burden you, but to remind you that there is cause for celebration in every good thing that God does, even in the pain of His Judgment.



     Now I eventually was cleaned up by the Lord and married a slightly older Christian gal who was and is dear to my heart.  And when my wife got pregnant one or two years into our marriage, I was astounded, but later was not surprised when it turned out blighted in the 3rd or 4th month and she lost it...never to be pregnant again....I have one child by her in heaven.....for you cannot have a placenta without first having a conceived child therein to feed it



     So to conclude my dear one reading this, there is cause and effect for everything in life, especially in light of the SCOTUS decision regarding Homosexual Unions. There is God’s eternal law of sowing and reaping and there are consequences to sinful behavior.



     There were many times in my life which God spared me from certain death and I am eternally grateful that He did for I would be in Hell right now, never having known Him or His good life.


     I am grateful to God that even though I feel the slow burning pain of being childless, I know that like in all things that He does, redemption and reconciliation is possible and when I meet them in Heaven, all things will be restored.



     So it’s a fearful thing to fall into the Hands of the Living God, but I’d rather endure His chastisement on this side of eternity, than on the other side. For on this side is mercy, grace, helps, forgiveness and healing, but on the other side is eternal torment and perdition.



     Thank you for reading this very personal testimony  Love ya lots-Brot